Just When I Thought My Mom Didn't Understand

When I was younger, I didn’t always know if my mother understood me. After all, she was my mom, and I was a very knowledgeable pre-teen and then teenager and then college student...or so I thought.

Shortly after college, my husband and I were married.

It wasn't as easy as we thought it would be to start a family. In fact, it was extremely difficult.

And I wondered, even then, if my mother fully understood what I was going through - physically, emotionally, and spiritually - at that time.

But then in June 2008, with the birth of our first son, my blessed journey as a mother of three began. Suddenly, things became clearer to me as conversations about motherhood began to take place with my mother...

"Mom, I had a baby. I never knew I could love something so much."

"I know, sweetie. I felt the same way when I held you and your brothers for the first time."

"Mom, I can’t get the baby to stop crying. I haven’t slept in weeks."

"I know how hard it is, sweetie. Your oldest brother had colic. It’s not easy, but this too shall pass. Try doing this…"

"Mom, I’m having another baby. I’m so excited. But I’m scared. How can I possibly love another child as much as my first?"

"Don’t worry, sweetie. You don’t think it’s possible, but it absolutely is. You have so much love for each and every one of your children."

"Mom, our sweet new baby throws up with every feeding. Will he be okay? This has been going on for weeks. I’m scared. We are now going to the hospital for scans. How can I put my faith in God right now?"

"I know it’s hard to put your faith in God, but you have to, sweetie. It wasn’t easy for us when you had spinal meningitis at 3 months old. And look - you were the miracle baby!"

"Mom, when all three boys are being difficult at the exact same time, and Matt’s still at work, I’m not sure what to do. I feel like I’m going to cry. Sometimes I do."

"I know, sweetie. I used to call the neighbor for backup when I needed a break. It’s normal to feel that way. Don’t be afraid to ask for help."

"Mom, the house is a mess. I just can’t keep up with it."

"I know, sweetie. It’s not easy. You need to ask for help. Find someone to help you with the house at least twice a month."

"Mom, homework time is a struggle lately. It’s a constant argument. I’m going nuts!"

"I know, sweetie. Don’t you remember when you didn’t like when I helped you with your homework and you asked Daddy to help you instead?"

"Mom, I feel like I tear up every time I realize how quickly the boys are growing up...like when they start a new school year or the school year ends...and really, everything amazing that happens in between."

"I know, sweetie. I always teared up too. I still do."

"Mom, I love what I do, but it is so tiring to be a mom and a teacher. I have no energy at the end of the day."

"I know, sweetie. When I was a teacher and you all were little, I used to lie on my back on the floor at the end of the teaching day and put my feet up on the wall and close my eyes for a bit."

"Mom, my heart aches when one of the boys’ hearts ache, and I can’t sleep.

That’s exactly how we felt when you were kids and how we still feel when you experience heartache."

"Mom, and then my heart feels like it’s going to burst when the boys accomplish something they have been working so hard to achieve."

"I know, sweetie! Isn’t it the best?"

After all these years, I never thought my mom understood me. And now that I’m a mom, I realize that she really understood me all along. If only I knew then what I know now.

Thank you, Mom!